Now is never the time for gun control politics

Politicians all over the USA have revealed their scheduled tweets in time for the next mass shooting at a school or religious service.

"I think it's important for the people of the USA to know that we have planned ahead and are ready to get straight onto social media," said Bret Billingsworth III (R)). "The people of whichever great state the next shooting will take place in deserve this level of care."

Important tweets that are planned and  ready to go include:-

"Our thoughts and prayers go out to the residents of -insertPlaceName- at this difficult time.  We know that the people of -insertPlaceName- are tough, resilient and have always come together to support others from -insertPlaceName.-  God Bless -insertPlaceName-".

"We are horrified and heartbroken to learn of the significant loss of life in the shooting in -insertPlaeName - Now is not the time for discussions about gun-control not when people are concerned and the incident is fresh in people's minds"

Great care has also been taken to deal with the issues of ethnicity and integration in areas in which such a shooting might lead to division.

If the shooter's ethnicity is of white, European descent:-

"We should not release the name of the shooter as that gives the oxygen of publicity they craved in life.  But we should ensure that we are focussed on issues of mental health in -insertPlaceName-"

If the shooter is of another ethnic origin:-

"We need everyone to know who these people are and what a risk to our society uncontrolled immigration is on a daily basis. They are coming from grandma next."

"Also, we are pushing through an important bill with regards to issues of gun violence, " explained Billingswoth III.  "The Federal government will make a fund of $100bn available so that politicians of all stripes can suitably staff their social media teams at such a difficult time."