Surreal Scoop

After months of campaigning, where each side accused each other of spreading fear , the UK EU referendum produced a surprise result, that the side which was promoting hatred and division, blaming ills on minorities in society along with obviously misleading statistics has been revealed to be composed of unpleasant people purely out for their own ends. “This has been a complete shock to me, I never expected people who were transparently only in it for their own careers to be self-serving,” said one disillusioned Briton. “And, the guys blaming everything on the immigrants it turns out they are quite unpleasant people.” One of the leading self-servers, Boris Johnson, defended his behaviour during the campaign, whilst making a speech to ensure everyone understood he could be a bit prime ministerial. “Look, gosh, no I won’t say that, let me start again. And notice the low, deliberate tone of my speech, very much like Churchill. So, let’s start again,” he said wondering whether or no...

As the country nears the crucial EU referendum more and more detail is being revealed about the impacts and perils of leaving, or remaining part of, the European Union.  With just a few weeks to go, the arguments are increasingly becoming technical, sifting carefully through mountains of economic and social data to tease quanta of vital information and illuminate of the intricacies of a decision that will affect all, or no one, in our everyday lives. “It’s absolutely clear that if Britain leaves the EU then we expose ourselves to increased risk of foreign invasion, specifically from the Orient, from the East, from that giant of Asia,” explained David Cameron.  “I refer of course to Godzilla, and how Britain would once again have to fight as it’s cities are crushed under radioactive, reptilian feet.” However the Brexit camp was quick to move to counter what they said was unwarranted, scaremongering based purely on hyperbole. “Nonsense, Britain would not be alone! Golly of ...

Surreal Scoop’s resident game reviewer, Nathan Billingsworth has recently left home and takes the opportunity that setting up a new place affords him for a spot of retro gaming. “I recently moved into a flat of my own and it’s taken a bit of time for the broadband internet to get sorted,” said Billingsworth.  “Being offline does not mean that I cannot game, in fact it gave me the opportunity to investigate some retro-games.  Are these games from the past worth a look now? “I tried out a spot of Hoovering.  It is a very old game I’ve never previously considered , but something my mum has been playing for years.  In addition it is something that has no online requirements at all.  Although there is a specific hardware requirement of a Vacuum Cleaner, although this is a standalone device. Playability “The controls are reasonably easy to master.  Basically you push a button to start and the same to finish.  So far so good. Graphics “I found that ...

The internet is awash with complaints from iPhone users who have had their phone repaired by a local, non-Apple phone shop, and therefore not repaired by a genius in a polo-shirt, to find that the phones refuse to operate - displaying messages such as “error 53”. Apple has released a press statement insisting that the iPhone’s constant checks for component integrity are important to maintain the device’s security, especially for use by secret agents. “Imagine you were in the Presidential Suite of a five-star hotel in Bangkok and just about to have sex with the stunning Russian woman you met a couple of hours ago in a burning warehouse,” asked Heidi Billingsworth, senior product evangelist at Apple.  “After the passion, you want to know that you can drift off into sleep, not having to worry about those four men that chased your rickshaw in a hail of gunfire. “With the iPhone constantly checking the integrity of it’s components, you know that the data on the ‘phone is se...